An online argument can be hard to avoid, but here is why you should give them a miss
We’ve all been there. You’re idly scrolling online when a comment catches your eye. You read it and the red mist descends. How could anyone think that?
There’s nothing I enjoy more than a good disagreement, but I try to avoid getting into them online. Here are four sensible reasons to stay well away from the battlegrounds of the internet.
1. They bring out the worst in people
You might get into an argument with the best of intentions. You’re just going to leave a quick comment, just to explain why what someone said is so completely wrong. But then they respond with an insult and it’s suddenly difficult to stay civil. Even if it doesn’t go as far as personal attacks, most internet arguments quickly descend into snarkiness and one-upmanship. Anonymity only makes it all worse, as people can wage verbal warfare without feeling ashamed that their mates will see their messages.
2. Some people are only there to watch the fireworks
Have you ever heard the saying “don’t feed the trolls”? In real life, if someone is arguing in bad faith – just trying to wind you up – it’s fairly obvious. But when all you can see of that person is their words on a screen, it’s a lot harder to know their true intentions. When YouGov polls show that over a quarter of ‘internet commenters’ have engaged in trolling behaviour, you have to question whether arguing online is a worthwhile endeavour.
3. They don’t go anywhere productive
Even if they’re not being completely disingenuous, very few people who hold long debates online do so because they want to reach a place of mutual understanding. They’re trying to prove their own superiority and get you to admit you were wrong, which means they will never back down. And in the fringe cases where you’re actually able to hash out a truce, what then? You’re never going to see that person and you’re probably never going to talk to them online again. All that time used up trying to change one random mind and you’re probably not even going to feel strongly about it a day later.
Which brings me to…
4. They never end
A real life argument is usually done in 15 minutes or so, allowing you both to get on with your life. But online, conversations happen very slowly and arguments can stretch out over days or weeks. Worse, anyone who stumbles across your conversation can join the fray, adding their own slightly different opinion to the mix and turning the conversation into a tangled, confusing and drawn out mess. If you are unwilling to walk away from an argument online, because you’re already committed or because you can’t let an insult go unanswered, then you will spend far too much of your time doing something you don’t enjoy and end up feeling mentally drained.
